Installation documentation HD video and sound

June 21, 2013 § 2 Comments

Film documentation of my installation A place prepared for sleep / Staður undirbúin fyrir svefn. 01:10, June 2013.

This film shows the delicate nature of the piece, specifically how each string corresponds with its neighbour – coalescing, diverging, moving in accord with the wind. In the background you can hear the waves of the Greenland Sea and birds calling.

The piece is situated on the cliffs of a peninsula, and the wind can have a strong affect on the waves of the sea in this area. A stronger wind produces vibrant movement by the strings, and also a corresponding louder soundscape from the sea. In time the sounds and the movement of the strings start to share a symbiosis.

It is at this point, at the realisation of the connection, that I start to focus off each specific string. It becomes part of my larger field of vision. The exploration of liminality in this piece, is how it draws out the space between the sound and physicality of a space. How the piece gives visibility to the surrounding sounds (which change), and gives audibility to that which is invisible in a sense (the way the wind passes over a certain place, the space just above the ground).

A place prepared for sleep marries these ‘in between’ aspects and in turn gives the space a grounding, or physicality. From there we can look at collectivity, and how we might share liminal spaces with others.

Documentation above by the inspiring Yogan Muller.

Please view in HD, headphones recommended.

No order

June 11, 2013 § Leave a comment

Digital Camera
Allies from unexpected places thank you. Last night I dreamed I was in a car with some women – I know them but from where (life, TV, pop culture??) – and we were driving in NYC. We had taken a road out to the east, trying to get to a really nice village on the outskirts of Manhattan  Not to Jersey mind… but as we were driving we had to go up a steep hill. W e could not drive the steeper one, but the one less steep well.. the driver she said the car would not make it.

This dream also coincided with another where i am living or travelling with a group and we stay by the sea. There is always some strange aspect to the beach, a whale, cliffs, a house on stilts.

Today after waking the second time (first time was 4.30am) I rode out to ALexandria, I bought a special plate for cheap cheap. I came home and Wyatt brought over a clothes rack. Then he took me to Midnight Special and shouted me a couple of drinks. It was nice to catch up and see him. The bartender even gave us free rum shots with orange wedges dipped in cinnamon.

I have no money but need to develop all my film. I applied for a job and need to do more. my ankles are swollen and sore always. I watched youtube videos on ways to exercise them.

I miss you all. Especially my women friends.

Unknown to us and others – Vitað að okkur og aðra

May 10, 2013 § Leave a comment

My best friend died when she was just a young girl. I am not sure if that is true, or even any form of truth for anyone. I can remember some of what it felt like to be a child. I remember houses mostly. Do you long to be alone? Are you no longer alone? I have three weeks here in Iceland and then I return home. Except there is no real home for me anymore. I never quite fit, and being here has helped me to understand that. You know that feeling when you have been mispronouncing a word. Then you learn the right way to say it, and suddenly the word feels foreign slipping from your lips. I have been mispronouncing a lot of words. That is a metaphor. Fuck you. i cried for you today and i hate that I feel that way. The distance between you and me is the distance between me and a mountain. The distance between you and me, me and a mountain.

Nothing really had changed since yesterday.

January 14, 2013 § Leave a comment

Yet the sensation persisted. All through the middle she felt a certain heavy warmth then cold. Like a brick had been thrust inside her chest, hot and wet before seeping into her cavities.

She put a hand against her breastbone, considered calling a doctor. Certainly nobody in her house was equipped to diagnose the problem.

She looked out her studio window, which faced the apartment in the adjacent building. Through the half-drawn shades she could see the torso of the man who lived there. He was preparing dinner.

Warm then cold it persisted. Clutching her belly she continued to stare at the man in the other building. He wore a blue singlet and black pants.

She realised at this moment she had never seen his face and this thought made everything expand, just for a second. Everything right through to the tips of her fingers.

She didn’t feel happy or sad.

I don’t want to know what you did, I want to know how what you did made you feel

January 14, 2013 § Leave a comment

I have doubts. Lots of them. I often want to retreat into moments of stillness remembered. I feel like I have subtly erased myself from the memories of people, my friends. I often think about dying. All the things I would no longer have to do or be responsible for. Not another morning waking up and feeling hollowed out and strange. noel kept asking me why I don’t take photographs of people anymore. And thats true. Except for lovers, I take photographs of them. I don’t really ever look at them, I just like knowing they are there. Mostly taken in times of silence and muted cooperation.

I remember walking around Toronto Island in twilight, following a group of peacocks. I wanted one of them to drop a feather. I watched their bodies and necks and tails. I didn’t realise that these birds have more than just blue feathers on their body and the tail feathers. They have red and iridescent and this strange spotted cream and brown. of course birds don’t just ‘drop’ feathers, so I wandered around a few of the spaces they seemed to hang around, or at least trying to find a nesting point. I found some feathers which I kept in my portable darkroom bag. I intended to do something with them, in the end I took them to another area and buried them, because, at the time, I felt I didn’t want them to blow away into the water.

I don’t think I am beautiful. I try to compensate by being interesting and interested in others.

I want to hear some new sounds. I want someone to lie with me in the morning and talk about what we are thinking. I want to be able to have someone see the same colours in the leaves of a tree shifting just a little as the sun is setting or rising.

I hear in Iceland, when I hope to be there, that the dawn and dusk are drawn out and the sky, land and ocean look very different. I feel that could be a defining moment for me. after making my portable labyrinth. Maybe before making my tethered boat.

Goddamn it.

You can email me your thoughts you have upon waking or just before you fall asleep, what makes you happy, a tree you remember from childhood, the sound your lover makes or how they make you feel or fail to make you feel. Anything at all, worthwhile and which you usually keep to yourself.

rush.of.sun@gmail.com

Entropy

January 14, 2013 § Leave a comment

You feel frustrated in your attempts to make your will manifest itself in a relationship, either public or private. This frustration can be seen by others as an irritability or anxiety and occasionally as a tendency to drift into self-righteous anger. There is a feeling that society or people around you are holding you back, which can lead to moral exhaustion and a sense of apathy if allowed to fester. Ultimately, if this continues, you will long only to be alone. You are easily stimulated by external events and will often seek stimulation as a means of self-fulfillment. A sense of personal emptiness often drives your desire for experience and thrills. Sometimes these can be seen as ways to connect with the outside world, which seems distant and unresolved. You feel great amounts of anxiety if you believe that restraints are being placed on you, either mentally, physically or emotionally. Any limits on your self-determination are viewed with hostility.

you need me more than i need me

January 14, 2013 § Leave a comment

This is a lie. This is a lie specific to me. I think I need you more than I need me. What is a need or a want? Did you know in Dean Campbell’s song Wichita Lineman he speaks not of love. He sings, “and i need you more than want you, and i want you for all time”. That is a lot of needing. If you want something, forever, and need it more than forever. How can that compare to some idea of love, which seems so soft in comparison.

Did Virginia need to fill her pockets with stones and walk into the River Ouse. Do farmers really want to prepare a decoy bird to sit alone in a cage and attract its free kin? The decoy birds wants to be free. The farmer needs to eat. We want to pretend decoy birds do not even exist.

Then you read they have found a pair of shoes in the woods. Only 40km from where the boy was last seen. This is not very far away for a body to lie and turn to bone. But it takes a long time for that to happen. So very close to return to the earth. Someone wanted to do that. The family needs to know.

I need you more than you need me.

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